DO WE ASK FOR HELP

DO WE STUFF IT INSIDE   OR HIDE IT FROM EVERYONE

DO WE LET IT EFFECT OUR RECOVERY

DO WE TALK ABOUT IT IN THE G A ROOM

DO WE TALK TO OUR SPONSOR

DO WE TALK TO OUR SPOUCE / FAMILY

DO WE SEEK PEOPLE WHO HAD THE SAME THING HAPPEN TO THEM

DO WE PRAY

DO WE DO NOTHING  AND WAIT TILL IT GOES AWAY

DOES OUR EGO SAY WE HAVE THE ANSWER SO WE DONT HAVE TO TALK ABOUT IT

DO WE LET IT LAY TILL IT BECOMES A REAL BIG  PROBLEM

HELP FOR GAMBLING PROBLEM CALL 888 LAST BET

ARNIE WEXLER CCCG
=========================

===============================

RELAPSE VS RECOVERY         BY ARNIE WEXLER
=========================

DO I FEEL UNHAPPY ABOUT MY LIFE

HAVE I STOPPED GOING TO GA EVERY WEEK

HAVE I FORGETTEN TO LIVE 1 DAY AT A TIME

IS MY SPOUSE NOT GOING TO GAMANON

I DONT REMEMBER HOW I FELT AT MY 1ST MEETING OF GA

DO I FEEL THINGS ARE NOT MOVING FAST ENOUGH IN MY LIFE

AM I STILL LIVING WITH MY OWN GUILT

AM I ASSOCIATING WITH PEOPLE WHO ARE GAMBLING

HAVE I STOPPED MY INVOLVEMENT WITH RECOVERYING PEOPLE

DO I FEEL DEPRESSED

IS MY EGO  TO BIG

DO I FEEL I CAN GAMBLE NORMALLY

AM I LIVING OVER MY HEAD

AM I NOT FOLLOWING MY PRESSURE GROUP FORMS

DO I NOT HAVE A SPONSOR AT THIS TIME

IF YOU ANSWER YES TO SOME OF THESE QUESTIONS YOU COULD BE ON SHAKEY GROUND

AND NEED TO WATCH OUT FOR A RELAPSE !

GAMBLING PROBLEM CALL 888 LAST BET

ARNIE WEXLER CCCG

==================================================

“I have 200 gamblers who bet with me every day when the N. F.L games start i have over 800 gamblers bet with me its the best time of the year for me”

Football is the most bet on sport in America.

I remember when Skip Ballis, then of the Dallas Morning News, had a gorilla in the Dallas Zoo make football picks for them,” Wexler says. “The gorilla’s picks were doing better than the sports writers”.

According to the National Gambling Study Commission, there are 5 million compulsive gamblers and 15 million at risk in the U.S.

It is easier today to place a bet than it is to buy cigarettes or a can of beer.

Arnie Wexler sais “I have spoken to more compulsive gamblers than anyone else in America over the last 43 years. “Some have spoken about embezzlements, white-collar crimes and destroying themselves and their families. Others were so desperate that they were contemplating suicide. ” “Over the years, I have also spoken to many college and professional athletes who had a gambling problem,”

Arnie Wexler is a recovering compulsive gambler who placed his last bet on April 10, 1968. Wexler has been fighting the injustice of how sports, society and the judicial system deal with compulsive gamblers for the last 43 years. He and his wife run a national help line: 1-888-LAST BET. If you want or need help, please call now.

Wexler says. “In fact, an NCAA study a few years ago noted that there is a disturbing trend of gambling among athletes in college. Do you think that these people will get into the pros and then just stop gambling? ”

“Compulsive gamblers are very vulnerable during the N. F.L season because they are looking for the ‘lock bet,’ Wexler says. “The media hype juices the gambler and — as addictive gambling is an impulse disorder — many compulsive gamblers will be in action and even some in recovery will relapse”.

“With all the games and the media hype about odds and betting lines, there is an explosion of betting on these games,” Wexler continues. “I can’t believe that newspapers carry ads from these so-called handicappers, who are really ‘scandicappers.’ It’s also interesting to note how often the information is incorrect. ”

You would not expect to open your local newspaper and get a price list of illegal drugs for sale; But that’s just about what you can get today when you open your local newspaper to the sports pages all over the country. True, you don’t see drug prices but you do see lines and point spreads on sporting events. Illegal drugs can’t be bought, legally in any state. You can’t place a legal bet in America, except in Las Vegas.

There are ads in newspapers for 800 and 900 numbers that sell information to gamblers. Some of these ads read : “Get the game of the month free”, “We pick 75% winners”, “Last week we went 11 for 12″, and ” Get our lock of the week”.

I think the responsible thing to do would be for newspapers, radio and TV shows to carry a public service message. ” Like if you or someone you know has a gambling problem and want help call 888 LAST BET

Picture the following scenario: A young man uses the lines and odds from his local newspaper and uses it to set up a bookmaking operation in the local town pub. A law officer comes in and arrests the bookmaker and players. The next day the headline in the paper says: ” John Doe Arrested For Bookmaking and Hank Smith Arrested For Illegally Betting”. Hypocrisy you say? The very newspaper that carried the lines, now is carrying this headline.

Years ago i was on a TV show that Howard Cossell hosted (ABC Sports Beat). The topic was: Does the media encourage the public to gamble? Bobby Knight, Indiana basketball coach, said: “A newspaper who published point spreads should also publish names and addresses of services that render to prostitutes. They practically have the same legality in every one of our states, and I can’t see why one is any better than the other” On the same show former baseball commissioner Bowie Kuhn said: “Anything that encourages gambling on team sports bothers me. We all look hypocritical but than why are we putting up the odds unless we are trying to encourage it” David Stern, NBA commissioner said: “We don’t want the weeks’ grocery money to be bet on the outcome of a particular sporting event”

I would like to pose a few questions:

• Do point spreads in newspapers cause a proliferation of gambling?

• Do people see point spreads in the newspaper and think it is legal to place a bet?

• Does the media entice people to gamble?

• Does the media have any responsibility for the increase in numbers of compulsive gamblers in America?

• Does the media give the appearance that it promotes and condones gambling?

Get the real scoop — talk to Arnie Wexler who is one of the nations’ leading experts on the subject of compulsive gambling and a recovering compulsive gambler.

You can reach arnie at 561 249 0922 or his cell 954 501 5270

He has worked with college & professional athletes who had gambling addictions. And has spoken on many college campuses over the years.He has been involved in helping compulsive gamblers for the last 43 years. Arnie has spoken to students who gamble in college day and night. They even gamble during class, and it even goes on in high school lunch rooms. According to a Harvard study a few years ago, 4.67% of young people have a gambling problem.

Experts tell us that the earlier a person starts to gamble, the greater the risk of them becoming a compulsive gambler. In another survey, 96% of adult male recovering gamblers stated that they started gambling before the age of 14.

Data from National Hot lines show:

Forty eight percent of the people who gamble, bet on sports.

Anyone who needs help for a gambling problem can call our 24 hour national help line

1-888-LAST BET

http://recoveringgambler.com/

aswexler@aol.com

561 249 0922

954 501 5270

ARNIE WEXLER CCGC

Arnie Wexler
Arnie & Sheila Wexler Associates
Lake Worth, FL
561-249-0922 954 501 5270

It is difficult to spot a compulsive gambler, because, unlike other addictions, it is a hidden and invisible disease. For millions of people, gambling offers a harmless and entertaining diversion from everyday life. Whether playing bingo or baccarat, these people are participating in a legitimate and time-honored recreational activity by taking a chance on an unpredictable event in the hope of winning. For others, however, the simple act of placing a bet is a vastly different experience. What seems a moment of elation or excitement for some gamblers is in reality a moment of overwhelming compulsion- a moment in which these people have lost the ability to control their gambling behavior. These individuals cannot resist the impulse to gamble- they are compulsive gamblers.

The American Psychiatric Association (since 1980) has defined the disorder using the following criteria:

Diagnostic criteria for 312.31 Pathological Gambling

DSM-IV

Persistent and recurrent maladaptive gambling behavior as indicated by at least five of the following:

1.    Is preoccupied with gambling (e.g., preoccupied with reliving past gambling experiences, handicapping or planning the next venture, or thinking of ways to get money with which to gamble)

2.    Needs to gamble with increasing amounts of money in order to achieve the desired excitement

3.    Has repeated unsuccessful efforts to control, cut back, or stop gambling

4.    Is restless or irritable when attempting to cut down or stop gambling

5.    Gambles as a way of escaping from problems or of relieving a dysphoric mood (e.g., feelings of helplessness, guilt, anxiety, and depression.

6.    After losing money gambling, often returns another day in order to get even (“chasing” one’s losses)

7.    Lies to family members, therapist, or others to conceal the extent of involvement with gambling

8.    Has committed illegal acts, such as forgery, fraud, theft, or embezzlement, in order to finance gambling

9.    Has jeopardized or lost a significant relationship, job, or educational or career opportunity because of gambling

10.        relies on others to provide money to relieve a desperate financial situation caused by gambling

It is important to note that this is a treatable illness and a person can lead a productive life after finding help and recovery.

The American Medical Association adopted a resolution ( Resolution 430 in 1995) citing “the addictive potential of gambling”, suggesting that their member physicians “advise their patients of the addictive potential of gambling”.

When I was the Executive Director of the Council on Compulsive Gambling of NJ, 8% of our calls to the hot line, came from casino employees. Since 1994, we have trained over 35,000 casino workers, nationwide. Raising the awareness of employees through training on the subject of compulsive gambling is sometimes the catalyst for the employee to seek help. Every time we do training, some workers, who have a gambling problem, themselves, or have a family member with the problem, approach us for help. Often we receive phone calls from employees, several months after they hear our presentation. Many of these people find it difficult to come forward with the problem, fearing that exposure will affect their chances for advancement with the company. Supervisors who recognize an employee who has a serious gambling problem also often approach us.

The problem exists at all levels of employment. Workers have approached us from housekeepers to executives of casino companies. There was a housekeeper who revealed that she stole items from guest’s rooms in order to support her gambling addiction. A casino limousine driver called us and was planning to kill himself as the result of his gambling problem. There was a pit boss that let dead-beat gamblers sign markers and then got a pay off from the gambler. A racetrack announcer called me for help after trying to fix races in order to get money to gamble with. We received a call for help from an employee on the hotel side, who was using customers’ credit cards to access gambling money for his gambling. A legal counsel to a casino company, asked for our help in getting him excluded from gambling in casinos in his state. A woman who worked in credit came forward to ask for help as she was in jeopardy of losing her marriage and children.

As the problem or compulsive gambler becomes more and more pre-occupied with their gambling they will eventually effect their company and their job performance. Some areas include erratic work performance, inconsiderate treatment of customers, borrowing money from coworkers or customers, absenteeism, tardiness, theft, embezzlement, affecting the integrity of the game they are dealing or by being coerced to fix games by bookmakers or loan sharks whom they may owe money to, and increased health care costs for them and their affected families.

It would be beneficial and good prudent, business judgment, if gaming companies helped their employees who had a gambling problem, rather than terminating them. Employees are their most valuable asset as they are often, in the front line with their customers Employers and supervisors need to realize that compulsive gambling is an addiction, similar to alcoholism and drug addiction.

Many companies already have health benefits that include treatment for other addictions. These benefits should also include treatment for compulsive gambling for employees and their families, paid for by the employer. Employers can also make available a room for an in house Gamblers Anonymous meeting. Human Resource and EAP personnel should have training on the subject of compulsive gambling. Brochures and information regarding help for a gambling problem, should be made available to all employees.

Another area that employers may want to consider is the legal ramifications of not taking action if they recognize that their employee has a gambling problem. They may be held accountable by the regulatory body in their state, for continuing to employ someone who has a compulsive gambling problem and is currently gambling. On the other hand, employers should have documented information before approaching a worker who is suspected of having a gambling problem.

Early detection of this hidden illness may result in the employee getting help before he or she reaches the desperation phase of compulsive gambling. With recovery, both the employee and the employer will benefit.

We are encouraged to see that some gaming companies have come a long way, in the last few years, by addressing this issue. They have developed training programs and responsible gaming programs and policies that have helped their employees who have a gambling problem.

Written by:

Arnie and Sheila Wexler

Arnie and Sheila Wexler Associates

213 Third Avenue

Bradley Beach, NJ 07720

732-774-0019  cell 954  5015270

www.aswexler.com

Arnie and Sheila Wexler have provided extensive training on Compulsive, Problem and Underage Gambling, to more than 35,000 gaming employees (personnel and executives) and have written Responsible Gaming Programs for major gaming companies. In addition, they have worked with Gaming Boards and Regulators. They have presented educational workshops nationally and internationally. They  have provided expert witness testimony. They also run a national help line (888 LAST BET). Sheila Wexler is the Executive Director of the Compulsive Gambling Foundation

A win is never big enough so they keep playing and dream that this time they will get the “Big Win” they crave. When it does ( sometimes it does ) it is still not enough so they keep gambling and lose more.

Just like “normal people” who win and buy something with the money, the compulsive gambler will only see a win as a sign that they are now on a winning streak so they risk more. They cannot stop the chase to win more and more. The human drama continues when they lose and chase the losses with even more money. The cycle continues.

Compulsive gambling is a progressive disease, much like an addiction to alcohol or drugs. In many cases, the gambling addiction is hidden until the gambler becomes unable to function without gambling. He or she begins to exclude all other activities from their lives. Their ability to stop gambling often results in financial devastation, broken homes, employment problems, criminal acts and suicide attempts.

The gambler will eventually remove themselves from reality to the point of being totally obsessed with gambling. They will do anything to get money with which to stay in “action”. They will spend all their time and energy developing schemes in order to get more cash to continue gambling. Lying becomes a way of life for the gambler. They will try to convince family, friends and even themselves that their lies are actually truths and they will believe there own lies.

Compulsive gamblers will hit a real bottom and it is then that some will try to do something to recover but most gamblers only want to stop but can’t. They are simply unable to beat the addiction. Most even at that point will keep gambling. Some will end up in jail, some will attempt suicide, others will die from their addiction as they will not take care of their health. Perhaps the stress will kill them.

A small group of addicted gamblers will finally seek and find real help but the real trick is to get in to real recovery. Not just  abstinence. By the time the gambler comes for help they have broken brains. They are mentally ill. To get real recovery, the gambler needs to work on themselves one day at a time.

Compulsive gamblers who want to recover and get a stress free life must find a “sponsor” someone who will do their thinking for them. A “sponsor” should be someone who has been in recovery for some time and has a real knowledge of how compulsive gamblers feel. After some time in recovery their brain will start to function normally and they will see their problem for what it is: a health and wealth issue. They will become productive on their job and become a good father or husband.   Recovery is a process and does not happen without a lot of work. The gambler must choose to make a moral and financial inventory. People can and do recover.

- ARNIE WEXLER CCGC

The gambler is eventually able to remove themselves from reality to the point of being totally obsessed with gambling. Eventually, they will do anything to get the money with which to stay in “action”. They will spend all their time and energy developing schemes in order to get the money to continue gambling. Lying becomes a way of life for the gambler.

They will try to convince others and themselves that their lies are actually truths and they will believe there own lies.

After they hit a real bottom they will have to do something if they want to try to recover.  Most gamblers at that point will want to stop but can’t (they wont be able to).

Most even at that point  will keep gambling  some will end up in jail  some will attempt suicide  some will die from their addiction as they will not take care of their health or the stress will kill them.

And a small group of addicted gamblers will seek and find real help  but the real trick is to get in to real recovery.  Not just abstinence.  By the time the  gambler comes for help they have broken brains (Meaning their brains don’t work like they used to when they were not in there addiction).

To get real recovery the gambler needs to work on them self’s  one day at a time and get someone to do there thinking for them who has been in recovery some time and has there brains  are working right   (a sponsor)  After some time in recovery there brains will start to work again.  They  will become productive on there job and become a good father  and husband.   Recover is a process and does not happen with out a lot of work on your self . and making a moral and financial inventory. But people can recover and do.

We arrived at the treatment center and went to see Dr. Bob’s patient. We talked for about an hour. He was a young man, about 21 years old and very handsome. He had the body of an athlete, seemed very intelligent and appeared to have quite a lot of potential. Yet, there was no doubt that he was a compulsive gambler and already had many losses including his career being in jeopardy. He was very likable and we hit it off immediately. For the next couple of weeks many of the conversations I had with Dr. Custer were about this patient. About three months later, in Bethesda Maryland, in the home of Dr. Custer,we met again. In the following year we met and spoke on the phone frequently. It seemed to me that we were becoming good friends. Even though he relapsed a few times over the next few years, we still kept in touch, often. During that time he still had the ability to perform  in his career but his employers were afraid that the gambling addiction might interfere. Unlike alcoholics and drug addict, who get second chances, it is more difficult for compulsive gamblers to get second chances . In the meantime, the young man got married and got a job in another field. He had his own radio show, and as most compulsive gamblers , he was able to succeed at this new endeavor. However, recovery continued to elude him. His pain was getting greater and greater. He wanted to stop, but couldn’t. The need to gamble was stronger than his power to stop by himself.  No compulsive gambler can stop on his or her own. He needed the help of other recovering people, but he was still struggling with this concept. The addiction had him by the throat and was destroying him little by little .

The death of Dr. Custer (in the mid 80’s) was a terrible loss to me and I know it had to be a tremendous loss for this patient. A few years later,  his wife gave birth to their first daughter. Now they had become a family. Over the next few years we were still having contact over the phone.  Often he would talk about his wife and his daughter  and how much he loved them.

Last year, before the Super Bowl, I was a guest on his radio show. The discussion was about compulsive gambling.  Even though he  hadn’t stopped gambling  himself, he was still eager to carry the message about the devastation of compulsive  gambling to his audience. Shortly thereafter he took a “geographical cure” and moved to Las Vegas,  the Mecca of gambling in America. For most gamblers this town is Heaven, but for compulsive gamblers it’s Hell. Again he was a host of a successful radio show.

With all the phone calls over the years, we had not seen each other for about five years. Last week was the first time I saw him, again. I was on one side of a glass partition, he was on the other. The visit took place in the North Las Vegas Correctional Center in Las Vegas, Nevada. As with all compulsive gamblers they will pursue their gambling into the gates of prison, insanity or death. As we talked over the prison phone, my life, prior to recovery, flashed before my eyes. Thank God I had stopped when I did or I could have been on the other side of the partition. At this time I am fortunate enough to have had recovery for  twenty-six years, one day at a time. My friend  told me that he had eight nine days without a bet. He said that now he believes he can stop and he wants to. That’s how recovery can begin. You admit you are a compulsive gambler and you have the desire to stop.

The next day I saw him in Court for sentencing on the charge of bank fraud. I had the privilege to be asked by him and his attorney to explain the issue of compulsive gambling to the court. Not in my wildest dreams could I have believed  that in my recovery I, or anyone else would ever be asked to speak in a Federal court about compulsive gambling.

With a room full of reporters, a family member, friends and some recovering compulsive gamblers, the Judge sentenced him to twenty-four months in jail. When I heard the sentence I got a pain in my stomach, my hands started to sweat and I could feel his pain. When the defendant stood in front of the Judge, his only request was to serve his sentence  in a federal prison in Terre Haute, Indiana, so he could be closer to his wife and his two children.

Although we have come a long way in the area of compulsive gambling awareness, there is still virtually no help in the Federal correctional system. It seems to me that it would be very difficult for a compulsive gambler to find recovery or stay in recovery in this type of setting. I believe the federal correctional system should provide some of the following services: counseling services, Gamblers Anonymous meetings within the facility,and education and  reading materials on compulsive gambling and it’s recovery. I believe strongly, that  incarceration time should be reduced in lieu of alternatives like halfway houses or in-patient treatment facilities. In addition I think that sentencing should include making full restitution(within a realistic budget), community service, continued attendance at Gamblers  Anonymous and on-going counseling services

It is ironic that he was sentenced two days before the Super Bowl because if not for the fact that he is a compulsive gambler  ART SCHLICHTER  might have been the starting Quarterback in the game.

- Arnie Wexler

By JON MARK BEILUE

Arnie Wexler was settling in to watch the Super Bowl about 25 years ago when he got a call from a desperate gambler who needed help because of losses from the game. Help? The game – New York Giants versus Denver Broncos – was barely into the first quarter.

“He didn’t want to wait two to three hours for the game to end to get action,” said Wexler. “So he lost $22,000 betting on the coin flip.”

You’ve heard of that saying that the Super Bowl is to the compulsive gambler what New Year’s Eve is to the alcoholic? So’s Wexler. He came up with it.

“Gambling is a mirage,” said Wexler. “A gambler thinks he’s smarter than everyone else. He’s not.”

Wexler is a reformed compulsive gambler who, along with his wife, run a counseling service for those across the country with the same problem he once had, one that nearly ruined him. Just after the Super Bowl is as busy for Wexler as Black Friday is to retail merchants.

“February is the biggest month we have,” said Wexler, who got more than 100 calls one year the day after the Super Bowl. “Before that, it’s pretty quiet. Then it just explodes with people looking for help, desperate people with nowhere else to turn.”

If Sunday’s Super Bowl XLV is similar to last year’s game, more than $82 million will be wagered legally, according to the Nevada Gaming Control Board. But that’s only money wagered on the state’s sports books by those age 21 and older.

And that, analysts say, is around 1 percent that is actually bet. A staggering $8.2 billion was believed bet in some form on last year’s Super Bowl, making it once again the biggest lures to wagering ever created. And it’s like crack cocaine for those who do it all the time.

That’s especially true with the endless side bets throughout the game: What will be the first song the Black Eyed Peas sing at halftime? Who will score more, the Packers or LeBron James, who plays earlier in the day? Who will the Super Bowl MVP thank first? God, family, teammates, coaches or no one? What will be the color of the sports drink dumped on the winning coach?

“It’s adrenaline,” Wexler said of the addiction. “It’s not winning or losing, but the true action. It’s about the juice that flows inside you even as you’re placing a bet. If they’ve lost betting during the football season, they chase the money in this game. If they’ve been winning, they want to double up.

“That’s why the Super Bowl gets that kind of action. There’s a two-week lag for it. In that time, every reporter in America has written all kinds of kind stuff including what kind of fingernails a player’s wife wears. There’s so much hype, and even for compulsive gamblers in recovery, they get juiced up and want back in. I get relapses this year all the time.”

But what of those who buy $5 squares at the Super Bowl party or wager on one game a year, and that’s the championship of the NFL? That’s harmless and victimless fun, isn’t it?

“There’s probably millions doing that, and it’s no problem for them,” Wexler said. “It’s like the guy who goes into the neighborhood bar for a beer. It’s not a problem, and millions gamble like that. But for people who are addicted to gambling – and there’s millions of those – the Super Bowl can often ruin you, your family, and your life will never be the same.”

Wexler, who has spoken at Texas Tech University three times about college gambling, lives in Florida. He quickly called me back because compulsive gamblers – estimates are at least 3 million in the country – aren’t limited to the Sunshine State. They are everywhere, old and young, men and women, blue collar and while collar. It’s naive to believe the Texas Panhandle is somehow exempt. Based on the percentage, there’s at least 2,000 in Amarillo alone that fit that category. Seems high until waiting in line at a convenience store as someone who won a few bucks on a scratch-off ticket turns around to buy more to scratch again.

“They’re not falling down. They don’t look disheveled or beat up like an alcoholic or drug addict,” Wexler said. “It’s such a hidden illness. You can’t smell it or see it. There’s no needle marks, no dilated pupils. But it’s as devastating as any addiction.”

The phones will be ringing from all over the country to Wexler’s office by early Monday. He will hear the same desperation and hopelessness in their voices.

“Most gamblers don’t seek help until they’ve bottomed out and lost about everything,” Wexler said. “If you’re a drug addict or alcoholic, the next hit or drink will make life seem better. A gambler has the mindset his next bet is going to his life around. It won’t.”

Jon Mark Beilue’s column appears three times weekly. He can be reached at jon.beilue@amarillo.com or 806-345-3318. His blog appears on amarillo.com.
For those needing help with a gambling problem, call 888-LAST-BET.